


lately

by bonrin



Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Character Death, Character Study, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Implied Okumura Rin/Suguro "Bon" Ryuuji
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 11:13:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17058746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bonrin/pseuds/bonrin
Summary: When Rin promised to himself that he'd never forget Usamaro, he wasn't lying.





	lately

**Author's Note:**

> [COIN - Lately](https://youtu.be/hy9czgir1xY)

When Rin promised to himself that he’d never forget Usamaro, he wasn’t lying.

He missed him a lot. Sometimes he’d just think about that time they played baseball, or the time they took a bath together. He just never forgot.

The thing is, it was so _frustrating_ to have a memory that nobody else had. Maybe what Cheng-Long Liu had said was right, maybe if he was the only one with a specific memory there was no point in having it.

He couldn’t help not thinking about the possibilities, though.

What would’ve Yukio taught Usamaro about exorcism? What flower would Shiemi have introduced him to that would’ve become his favorite? Would Izumo bring him clothes and try to braid his hair when she thought no one was looking? Would Konekomaru have to nervously scold Shima for suddenly scaring Usamaro with his screaming because there was a bug right next to him? Would Rin and Suguro ever get extremely flustered and red-faced at ever being alone with the kid because _oh god, it’s like we’re parents?_

He visited Usamaro’s shrine every once in a while. Time passed, and he would visit less, but it didn’t mean he ever stopped. And in the midst of a breakdown that would’ve been caused by anything _but,_ he’d remember Usamaro and the feelings would come back all over again. It was so _stupid,_ he'd only known the demon for a few days and here he was, having had made the mistake of getting attached and remembering him when nobody else could.

Rin overthought ways on how he could've saved Usamaro. Would he have been able to stop the coal tar infestation? Would there ever be a way of everyone else remembering him again?

Would he be able to unseal him from the shrine?

The other exwires got worried whenever Rin would isolate himself from everyone, even if it was for a little.

But how was he supposed to tell them he was mourning over someone that technically didn't exist?

It took a long time, but Rin had to realize that he just had to leave it be, even if it made him sad. That's what he'd taught Usamaro too, right?

_Some memories are sad, and that's okay. Because no matter how bad they make you feel, there are things you just can't forget._

**Author's Note:**

> i rewatched the movie for the fifth time and decided to write something short i've been thinking of writing for a while!
> 
> my tumblr is [sugurobonryuuji](https://sugurobonryuuji.tumblr.com/)!


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